Today at precisly 10 to 10am i got some news that made me get that feeling the first day i was told i had Cancer. Where you knew it was bad news. . . . i felt like my heart stopped and it became very heavy. . . . my stomach was knoted and my mind was screaming NOOO!
I was told that one of my Friends from school and from the hospital, isnt expected to make it through the weekend. . . .
She was doing so well and was so hopeful and she is LOVED BY SOOO MANY! She had already beat the odds and she was doing FANTASTIC!!!! she had went into Remission approx 3-4 months after she finished treatment. . . . and from some complications were stuck in edmonton and were unable to search for more help in BC. I can not say that we are best friends because we arent. . . and i can not speak for her but i can say that she means something to me! she was my first example of complete reziliance, courage, and strength she was in a sense my hero! She has already went through soo much in her life and she doesnt deserve to die so young! (the school did allow her to graduate today!! i hope she had fun i wish i could have been there!)
I'm basicaly at a lose of words i'm not sure what to say i'm not sure what i think! I want so badly to beat this now i want to do it not only for myself but for Kayla! I'm still waiting i guess for that miracle she DESERVES that she needs!!! but i would hate to have her suffer more! it would be selfish of me to want her to stay if God wants her else where. . if God does chose to take her i will always remember her as a Woman who ALWAYS held her head high always had a smile on her face and was just an amazingly spirited girl and never lost hope or gave up! she always knew how to lighten a mood, or what to say if someone was down!
Ha ha i remember this one time i was spending a few minutes with her before she went into surgery! She was SOOO mad that she wasnt aloud to eat she was (NPO) so she couldnt eat anything solid by mouth! but you were aloud ice chips and a little bit of water! and then they were telling her she couldnt have water! and we were alone talking in the room and i was trying to help her sneak some ice chips in, hahah that was fun and right when i was giving it to her the nurse walked in and we almost got into some MAJOR trouble! i'll always remember that no matter what happens!
I Pray that i never am in Kayla's situation but if worse comes to worse! i just wish that i will be given the same support and love that is shown to Kayla! But now more than ever am i determined to BEAT THIS STUPID CANCER AND BEAT THIS FOR KAYLA!!!
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